Self-Abandonment

Childhood self-abandonment

Self-abandonment in children are real, and even though as children we have all experiences with self-abandonment it still carries forward. This is one experience I had that I had forgotten about.

I was sitting one day feeling like I had a great burden on my shoulders. I was feeling over whelmed. So, I decide to go into my Akashic Records to maybe gain some insight and relief. Upon sharing my story with my team, I sit back, and a memory starts to unfold. When I was about 13 years old and the night before my father had passed away very suddenly. I remembered laying on my parent’s bed sobbing uncontrollably. At that I was very aware what death meant and I was shaken.

I remember my uncle came in to try and comfort me. Very lovingly he said Kevin you have to pull yourself together. Your father is gone and now you are the head of the house. You have a sister and three younger brothers to look after. And your mother and grandmother are going to need your support. It is going to be up to you to look after your father’s homestead as a legacy to him. At that moment the loss of my father seemed rather insignificant to the responsibility of looking after my father’s affairs. My uncle was doing the best he could do, he really had no idea what else to say.   Through the loving insights of the Akashia I had pushed my inner child down in order to “man up” and carry the burdens of my father. It was not easy but as a human with a strong spirit we can do a lot of things. Obviously, the work on this part of my life is not over but it did open a whole new awareness.

Ways to experience self-abandonment

What are the different ways that a child can experience self-abandonment? There are a lot of them. When a parent gets sick and can no longer take of the children or house. Often the child will set their needs aside and take over the duties. Even when the parent gets better the child forgets to go back to being a child. This can also be when a parent is in extreme pain, weather physical or emotional. It is human nature to want to take that pain away from a loved one and so for the child this also applies. In trying to comfort the parent the child steps from being a child into adulthood.

Rejection

Rejection is another way of childhood self-abandonment. It does not matter whether rejection is real or perceived, the inner child perceives it as real. This rejection can come from anyone as well. For example, when you were young. Your mother was cooking dinner and you came running in to show her something really important and she said not now “I am cooking dinner, go play”. Maybe in a rather stern voice, you felt hurt and rejected. Did she mean to be hurtful? No probably not. But you perceived it that way. Another example could be when you where on stage doing a play and you made a mistake or tripped and everyone laughed at you. You felt a rejection from them, and even though you did not know them it made a big impact on you as a child and you withdrew.

Physical or mental abuse

Parents or gradians with substance abuse can create childhood self-abandonment issues. Or is physically abusive, the child escapes inside themselves to hide for protection. Bullying in school can create the same kind of response as well. And this can come from other students as well as teacher’s.

As you can see sometimes it can be obvious what happened and sometimes it is subtle.  There are so many causes of putting that inner child to the side and taking the responsibilities of adulthood on their shoulders. Simple little things to very complex comments. And it is all in how the child perceives the words.

Working in the Akashic Records

Within the Akashic Records it is a very safe place to begin to pull that inner child back out from the hiding spot deep within your inner being. The goal we are striving for is to be able to love our self no matter what. Self love is also the destination of our human existence. To be able to see the divine love that lies within all of us.

In an earlier blog we talked about what the Akashic Records are. We said that the one part was the fixed blueprint of our soul. Within that blueprint is the connection we can make to bring that withdrawn child back into the fullness of true self love.

Through your Akashic Records there is a path set for you and having all these experiences helps you detect that path. Your free-will has an influence on what you do. If you do not feel safe or you do not think it is a good idea to allow that inner child to come out and be loved. Then you will continue to be were you are. You want to look at “what will make me feel safer to be able to embrace my inner child?” It is so important to be one with yourself, to embrace that self love on every level of yourself.

Set time aside to love yourself

Take the time for “me”. Everyday set aside time to truly love and take care of yourself. Every morning when you wake up and give yourself a big hug, look in the mirror and say, “I Love You”. You can sit at the beach and make a sand castle or go for a swing. Just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you can not take time to look after that inner child. I am not saying that you need to act like a child, just take the time to acknowledge that inner child.

Doing a hobby like scrap booking, gardening, working on an old car or wood work. The possibilities are limitless, anything that you love to do or have a passion doing can activate that same response.  What that your inner child is going to hear is, “I love you, I am so sorry I have ignored you and stepped away. But I am here now, and we are one again”. And that is the power of love.

Questions you can ask in your Akashic Records or your intuition

• Do I have any self-abandonment issue’s that I need to look at? And if I do can you give me a sense of what they are and when it was a good idea that I took them on? How did this withdrawal support me and make me feel safe?
• Can I love myself even though I have this issue, or went through this experience?
• How can I make my inner child feel safe and loved? Is there some action I can take or do, that will help me to love myself to the fullness I deserve to be loved? With this action you want to make sure you can follow through. If it feels to big, ask for it to be broken down a little. You want to make sure you can follow through on a regular basis.